Posts by Shalynn Flavell

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Well hello everyone! This is one of my favourite tools / solutions for anxiety, heightened emotion, overthinking & obsessing that I LOVE TO SHARE. Those of you who are (or have been) my clients will be familiar with this as I’m sure I taught it to you. So, then this is a great reminder to use it 😉
Just another way to create more contentment ✨

I had the fortune of seeing Gretchen Rubin (author of The Happiness Project & Better Than Before) speak in San Diego last week. She was sharing about her her new book “The Four Tendencies” & discussing the 4 personality profiles she discovered after investigating how people respond to expectations.
It’s a great framework to better understand yourself & others – it opens doors to deeper conversation & connection with yourself & your loved ones
I find I’m enjoying having it as another helpful tool when I pause to observe my responses & internal dialogue. I’m also better understanding responses & reactions from those I know & love by simply observing them & considering their responses based on their tendency.
So, perhaps share the quiz over dinner with loved ones & support each other in being your best selves by using this tool.
Take the quiz here & find out your tendency…
(BTW – I’m an Obliger with Rebellious tendencies ;-D)

https://www.surveygizmo.com/s3/3706759/Gretchen-Rubin-s-Quiz-The-Four-Tendencies

https://vimeo.com/238988363

Hello Hello!

I thought I’d add a link to my Youtube channel where I have some short videos that walk you thorough some simple tips, tools & insights to keep your mindset in check 🙂 I’ll be uploading probably more regularly than I am posting to this Blog to be honest ! Click ➔ https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCUiFnECqrCwNwup17NS0vng

Also come join me in my FB group ‘The Contentment Collective’ – as I post there more regularly too – then click ➔ https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheContentmentCollective/

Hello hello! It’s been a while….

This year has been moving right along at an unbelievable rate & it reminds me of hearing both my grandmothers & then eventually my parents telling me that as you get older time speeds up. Indeed. I guess I’m officially “older” now – I can’t believe it’s already June.  The other thing I’m noticing – as I’m sure you all are too – is that everything is speeding up, not just time. As a society we expect everything to happen quickly – people are required to be faster at their work, get more done, multi-task to the Nth degree. Be juggling texts, emails, phone calls, projects, kids, families, eating. drinking, traveling, LIVING at such a pace that our minds race and for many barely even turn off to sleep. No wonder a general state of anxiety is so pervasive. Hardly anyone spends time actually IN the present.

So, that said, I’m sharing with you something that will help.

I’ve continued enjoying supporting my clients in getting control of their thinking & their lives – but the one thing that keeps coming up is clients asking me to remind them of one of the most valuable tools I always teach –  how to SNAP OUT of negativity & old “programs” & habits in 6 steps.

My 6S to Success™ solution is written out in a previous blog post but here is a fleshed out version that can be downloaded & printed. I figured it made sense to create a “takeaway” for you all, one that you can refer to & use for any & all unwanted habits, thought patterns, negativity, worry etc.

This is just one of the ways to practice becoming more present in your life. Anxiety & worry are not activities of the present. So the more present you are, the calmer, more relaxed & at ease you are – period.

If you have questions – shoot them my way!

Check it out & download it here  ➔  6S to Success™

WATCH me walk you through the 6 Steps  ➔  https://youtu.be/PUjnt_La83Q

Worrying.. ugh…SO uncomfortable and negative in its energy, yet seems to be such a part of life for many people. It seems like a thing we’re supposed to do. We’re supposed to worry about people we love..aren’t we? We’re supposed to worry about work/money/the state of the world ..right? That means we care..doesn’t it?

Yes it does mean we care! But here’s the thing- here’s what we should actually be doing. CARING and LOVING, not worrying and fretting.

Love and care are positive activities (and feelings) of mind and body. Caring is a positive projection of energy. When we love and care, we are hopeful. We feel good when we create and cultivate that kind of energy and those comforting, considerate, warm thoughts. Loving and caring does something good for us. We feel more positive, we feel more energetic, we feel happier, we have more mental and emotional energy and we then feel more supported by life.

Worrying is fear based – it’s a projection of negative energy. When we worry we are afraid of negative outcomes. We feel uncomfortable, we become anxious, we become preoccupied, we dwell, we feel uneasy, we get nervous, we fret. We launch ourselves into creating “negative” energy and feelings, AND we all know worry doesn’t really change the situation, person or thing, does it?!  What it does do is reinforce discomfort and dis-ease within and causes our mind to “go there” all to easily.

If you’re the type of person who “what if’s” everything, then you know those can go on forever. You probably already have a solution or plan of action ready to go for whatever might happen anyway. You’ve probably played out, and thought through, all sorts of scenarios a multitude of times.

So what if you let go of the “what if”-ing?  So what if you trust yourself to manage and handle whatever comes your way easily?  After all, you’re well rehearsed, are you not?

Now unfortunately, like many other things we do over and over in our minds (and bodies), worry can simply become a habit. A mode of behaviour that kicks in automatically – a pattern or program we continue to fuel and strengthen by getting all caught up in the activity and feelings of worry. Something we generally do unconsciously, but certainly something you can change (See my previous post for a tool and tips to halt the habit http://templehypnosis.com/my-6S-solution-for-overthinking/)

So STOP yourself before you go too far and launch yourself into worrying, spinning yourself up in knots, fretting and creating that discomfort of fear. Back up. Take a look at what’s behind or underneath your worries. See and feel what’s REALLY going on. Inevitably there is a positive intent, a positive feeling, idea or desire underneath. Inevitably it’s love or care in some form.

Simply – STOP, back up & notice your POSITIVE feelings and thoughts underneath- notice where that old worry was actually stemming from. From something good no doubt.

(Now if there is a solution that needs to be found, or a problem that can be solved for the thing you’re worrying about- then understand that, and move into productive thinking – into problem solving mode. Worrying mode only really produces uncomfortable results – it rarely solves anything.)

Notice if what you’re experiencing is the the habit, the worry program kicking in, or, is it that you care, you love. That you hold that something or someone as important and special to you. If so, then sit with it – sit with and be in the positive feelings and thoughts of love, care and hope. Notice how this feels different.

Catch yourself – and practice backing up and being in the good stuff. Cultivate and grow loving and caring energy for and toward the things you used to worry about. Practice staying in this optimistic state. This feels better. This feels positive. This does you good.

And soon, you’ll begin to experience yourself as you really are – a loving, caring, thoughtful person. A hopeful optimist – rather than a negative worry wart or nervous nellie. You’ll feel things are indeed more positive – your perspective becomes brighter. Perhaps you begin to notice what is really worth expending and projecting your energy on, and in what way you choose to do it.

Watch my short video about WORRY here ➔ https://www.facebook.com/templehypnosis/